Just stuff...

I remembered this one time when a person said a horrible thing to me that changed my whole attitude against life... She said " Just for a moment, why can't you be normal". The person was my mum'. Even though this was a very long time ago at a occasion when she was over tired and easily annoyed... It hurt me... To know that she really thought that way, but didn't want to admit it... It felt bad... From that moment on I've always felt a bit like an outsider... I mean... Her words got me to think in a way that isolates a part of me from the outside world... Sounds stupid, doesn't it.. eheh.. ^^''
In my world, people like me are the "normal" ones, and people different from me are the "strangers". I think that's the main reason why I don't feel like I belong here... I'm surrounded by "strangers". Strangers that I love, strangers important to me like nothing else and strangers who ever can't be replaced by "normal" people. Still I can't help but to feel like a nobody to them. It's difficult and doesn't really make sense ^-^'' Yeah...
But in another matter, I somehow enjoy the feeling of being different. No one can say "you're just like everybody else" or "You don't have a own will". Well who cares?
The Christmas realtive date was strenuous, my "plastic" grandma' doesn't seem to get that I can't eat things with lactose in and that I'm a vegetarian -.-'' She really is an old fashioned "lady", except from one thing. My brother's got a piercing in his eyebrown, so when I told mother that I liked his new ornament (spike thing) and suggested that a adornment like that would fit my lower lip too, my "granny" said that it wouldn't look too bad... hmm... maybe she was just sucking up to me... ~.~'' Well it's getting pretty late, so I'll go to bed. Good night.